Online Dating Can Be Heartbreaking

I have seen too much heartbreak. Some heartbreak can be reasonably avoided from proper use of online dating services. Meeting new people should be fun but without researching people, it is hard to know what you are getting. Dating services do not vet the people online. How do you know what is being represented is truthful. Here is what you can do when using online dating services.

Tip #1 - Hire a Private Detective or Attorney. 

Before you start a relationship, hire a private detective or lawyer to run a data search not available to the public. The investment may be worth your time and money as compared to having heartbreak from a bad situation.

One client believed a person met online only to find out that they were habitually misrepresenting and lying about themselves. No one could tell that person was lying without talking to others because they were so convincing. Now they have a child to support, debt, and many years of dealing with each other as parents.   You could be dealing with a stalker, mentally ill person, a freeloader, an imposter, or a sociopath. When you are, “in love” being fooled is easy. Consider by analogy, if you were the owner of a company called “Your Life”.  Would you hire the person for a partner in your life company without researching them, talking to references or other investigation?

Tip #2 - Play Detective. 

Search information regarding the person. Search online for court cases in the county where the person lives. Find out what the persons relationship is with their own family, including mother and father. If they do not have, a relationship with their parents is forewarned this is a negative sign. How a person treats, their family is a telltale of how they treat others. Ask questions in different ways to see if you get consistent answers. This is easier if you meet in person in a public setting like a restaurant but you can find out a lot by researching online for court information and public records.

Tip #3 - Trust your Gut.

If you do not feel right, about something trust yourself and let that person go. If it is too good to be true, it usually is. When you get a warning sign, say to yourself “Run Forest Run” as in the movie “Forest Gump.”

Tip #4 - Keep Safety in Mind.

Be safe by omitting your phone number, address, and email address. Set up a separate email address for all email for dating sites and use it for nothing else. If you have your personal information on social media, it is easy to search your personal information there. Before you know, you could be identified, located, and then stalked by sociopath.  Have privacy settings configured on all social media. This can be dangerous.  

Tip #5 - Be aware. 

Statistics show that approximately 20% of our population has mental health issues. (See statistics from regarding the prevalence of mental health issues)

Be safe, be guarded from heartbreak. Take precautions and research anyone you are considering dating.